Trigger warning: This story mentions violence and suicide ideation that some readers may find disturbing.
April 14, 2022. While in the kitchen of a steamboat restaurant where she worked, a colleague told Han Hongli that someone was outside looking for her.
Screengrabs of the aftermath of the incident on social media.
It turned out to be her estranged husband.
“The moment I saw him, I knew … something bad is going to happen,” said Hongli, then 42.
“Some people commit crimes – beating others up, robbing others. Why not them? Why me?”
By the time she caught sight of the silver glint of the chopper in his hand, it was too late.
“He had already caught me by my hair,” recalled the Chinese national who had come to Singapore in 2016 to work.
Her estranged husband brutally attacked her. He slashed her more than 40 times across her body and also severed her finger. Hongli was blinded in her left eye.
Videos of the bloody assault that happened along Beach Road went viral. Netizens were horrified.
The videos also showed passers-by hurling plastic chairs and dustbins at the man, and fending him off with ladders.
Hongli believes they saved her life.
“Why me?”
In the days after the attack, Hongli seethed with anger and bitterness.
“I truly hated him. I even felt the hate in my bones,” she admitted in Mandarin, some eight months after the incident.
As she lay in hospital alone with her injuries, anger morphed into non-stop thoughts of suicide.
Hongli lamented to God: “I’ve worked so hard all my life. Since young, I’ve not done anything to harm anyone. I’ve not let anyone down. Some people commit crimes – beating others up, robbing others. Why not them? Why me?”
At her lowest point in life, she felt that God had forgotten and abandoned her.
But little did she know, God was about to surprise her with His love.
As Hongli endured the first in a series of operations, she saw a remarkable sight: Angels surrounding her and watching over the procedure.
“I couldn’t see their faces but I saw their white wings moving,” she said of the vision.
“I didn’t know if they were real at first. It made me feel quite childish.”
As Hongli endured the first in a series of operations, she saw angels surrounding her and watching over the procedure.
Later, she met someone who helped her grow more confident that what she saw were indeed angels sent by God.
That someone was Eric Lee, a volunteer manager from The Sojourn Programme.
Run by The Salvation Army (TSA), the programme seeks to care for and improve the well-being and resilience of migrant workers in Singapore. It also provides injured migrants with temporary shelter, physical therapy rehabilitation sessions, counselling, and mental wellness programmes.
Eric Lee was one of the angels whom God sent to Hongli when she was in hospital. Photo courtesy of The Salvation Army.
Eric regularly visited Hongli while she was in hospital. TSA volunteers also accompanied her to medical appointments two to times a week.
Hope amid the storm
Before her crisis, Hongli’s main goal in life was to earn as much money as possible to provide for her two school-going children in China. They are 20 and 17.
Meanwhile, her faith in God stayed only at the back of her mind.
She confessed: “I knew Jesus was in my heart but I thought, ‘Wait until I’m older with nothing to do then maybe I’ll go to church more often’.
“I assumed church is for people with nothing better to do – like old women. Not me. I’m young. I need to earn money. Why should I waste my youth in church?”
Hongli before the attack.
But after the attack, the more Hongli spoke with Eric and other volunteers, the more she saw God’s unconditional love for her.
“Through them, I found my way back to God’s family. I’m very grateful. God loves me so much,” she said.
So amid the storm she was in, Hongli made the choice to rededicate her life to Christ. She was determined to learn more about Him.
This decision gave her newfound hope.
“At one point in time, I was so depressed that I wanted to commit suicide.
“But I realised, wow, if Jesus loves me so much that He sent His angels and many kind people to help me, how can I think that I cannot live? Or that life has no meaning?”
Gradually, her suicidal thoughts disappeared.
Defying the odds
Still, Hongli struggled with the severity of her injuries.
Losing her sight in her left eye was the hardest to deal with.
Doctors told her that her retina was so damaged that she only had a 5% chance of regaining her eyesight, even with a donated cornea.
“I was devastated. Up until that point, I had held out hope that I would be able to see again, even if it was a little bit,” she said.
She did not want the donations, sent by kind souls for her medical bills, to go to waste.
Full of grief, she was quiet for five minutes. Then she made up her mind not to have the cornea transplant.
The operation – estimated to cost $10,000 to $20,000 – was too much for a mere 5% chance of success, she reasoned.
She did not want the donations, sent by kind souls for her medical bills, to go to waste. (A crowdfunding campaign had raised more than $100,000 for her medical bills.)
“I decided to put my eye in God’s hand. The Bible says God can heal the blind. So let Him heal me,” she said.
Though her eye isn’t yet healed, Hongli remains thankful for God’s provision in other ways.
For example, Hongli is now able to confidently move about on her own. She is also no longer bothered when people stare at her.
“My character is now so carefree and optimistic. I thank God for the strength He gave me to overcome this. Praise God!” she said.
Doctors had told Hongli that she may not recover the use of her hand. But she has since regained its mobility. Photo by the Thirst Collective.
Doctors had also told Hongli that there was little hope for her to regain the use of her severely injured hand.
However, after undergoing surgery to reconnect her nerves, she felt the strength of her hand return through physiotherapy. She is now able to grasp objects and lift weights of up to 2kg.
“I can even wrap dumplings now!” said Hongli, beaming.
Today, she lives at a temporary shelter provided by The Salvation Army.
Letting go of bitterness
In Hongli’s eyes, her attacker is unrepentant.
“When he attacked me, I begged him not to chop me to death, you know?
“I said, ‘What would happen to our children?’
“But he didn’t stop. If he had regretted his actions, he would have stopped after the first slash,” she said tearfully.
“He wants me dead, why should I pray for him? If he dies, good!”
When a Christian friend first urged her to pray for her attacker, Hongli retorted: “Why should I? He wants me dead, so why should I pray for him? If he dies, good!”
But on her 43rd birthday – eight months after the attack – she finally resolved to take steps to forgive him.
She began to pray for him.
“I pray that he will realise his wrong. I hope someone will share the Gospel with him to let him know God too,” she said.
While Hongli hopes to one day forgive her estranged husband for the attack, she admits that “I haven’t gotten there yet”.
“But from today I want to slowly forgive him and what he did to me.
The scars on her arms are constant reminders of what Hongli’s estranged husband did to her, but she is taking steps to forgive him. Photo courtesy of The Salvation Army.
Throughout her challenging journey of recovery, Hongli has experienced God’s unconditional love and the strength He has given her.
It is this strength which has helped Hongli take a step towards forgiving her estranged husband, who was charged with attempted murder on April 16.
“If it were up to me, I wouldn’t forgive. I would still hate him and think of revenge.
“But because of God, all my bitterness, my hatred, my grudges … All of it is gone.”
“Better than I can imagine”
Eight months on from the lowest point in her life, Hongli says she is now a different person.
Once self-reliant and assured of her own abilities, she now relies on God in everything that she does.
“Even when I say ‘I can’, the strength to do so is from God. And even when I don’t know it, God still gives me strength,” said Hongli, who now spends her time helping out at The Salvation Army.
Eight months on from the lowest point in her life, Hongli says she is now a different person.
As Hongli continues to heal and recover, she hopes to share her story to encourage others to see that God is real.
“Many non-Christians would probably discount my encounters as inconceivable.
“But I really saw God and really encountered Him. Only after my injury did I really, truly know God,” she said.
“The Bible says to taste and see that the Lord is good. Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him (Psalm 34:8). At the end of the day, our God is even better than I can imagine.”
Since August 2022, The Salvation Army (TSA) has provided Hongli with a roof over her head, counselling, physiotherapy, TCM treatments and daily meals. To give back, she would like to help others by appealing for funds for TSA’s temporary shelter.
For more information and ways to support, please contact Javier at [email protected] or Angel at 6555-0243.
This is an excerpt of an article that first appeared in Salt&Light.
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